How To Move on After a Breakup in a Healthy Way

Back in the early 60’s Neil Sedaka recorded a song called “Breaking Up is Hard to Do” which rapidly rose to the top of the charts. He unwittingly tapped into a reality that we all know, there is no worse part of a relationship than the breakup.

The pain of a breakup can be so strong people will stay in relationships far longer than is healthy. It doesn’t matter if you’re on the receiving end of the breakup or the one initiating it either. There are people that try to break up with someone by cutting off contact rather than facing the person to tell them. There are others that will withdraw for weeks after being broken up with.

Experiencing this much pain is traumatic. Just as a cast is needed to treat a broken limb after it’s been set in place, counseling can be used to treat the emotional pain of a break-up.

Friends can be great to talk to after a breakup, but they can also be problematic. Breakups involve two people and your friends will tend to paint a picture where you were perfect and the other person caused all the problems. This can lead to a similar relationship in the future with the same ending, a vicious cycle.

A counselor can help you truly move on by painting a picture where both of you contributed to the relationships demise. This healthier approach leads to personal growth. It can break a cycle of bad relationships and open the door to new, better relationships in the future.

Moving on from a breakup can be scary. Friends and family may try to help, but can push you before you’re ready. This can lead to a repeat of the last relationship, or an even worse one. An experienced counselor will help you avoid self-destructive behavior, such as jumping into a new relationship before you’re ready.

At East West Therapy in Honolulu, HI you can speak with a counselor who has over 20 years of experience helping others emotionally. We use a whole life approach and will provide you with ideas for healing that go beyond our time together in the office. Contact us now to set up an appointment.